We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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