Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
