just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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