Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
