he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
