if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
this is an emotional support booty call
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
