he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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