So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
