More tranny stories later!
Betty ford says i'm here all night
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
