Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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