i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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