Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
