GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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