She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
