I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
