I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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