i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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