If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
