we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize