We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
