Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
