blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize