so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
