we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
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