Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
