can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I've blown a few things in my day
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
