just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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