She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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