Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
