I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
