That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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