Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
