Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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