Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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