very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
