Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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