Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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