True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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