Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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