How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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