dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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