it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize