I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
