I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
