look no pants
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
