So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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