I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
