Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
