remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
