So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
