yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
